Wednesday 18 August 2010

#36 With A Bullet

The X Factor restarts on Saturday and I cannot wait. I am deliberately abstaining from all alcohol, fun and social contact until this point so that I can best experience the highs and lows of the show. I might even stop bowel movements to fully eliminate any pleasure. Come Saturday, I will laugh at the sob stories and weep at the sob stories so much I will snot.

And for the successful contestants, it will be good too. They can see themselves on screen and think they will be big stars like Diana Vickers, Alexander Burke and JLS, some of the most acclaimed acts ever on the show. They too can chart at #36 with their second single, rerelease their album twice and sample Julie Andrews in desperate search of a chorus.

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